I love it when my students follow instructions and end up with a clever, creative essay! I taught them to add a clause which began with who and include somewhere in each paragraph an interesting adverb to describe a verb. Here's what three of them came up with:
The pig and mule were ready to fight. Because the mule was so old, the pig, who was arrogant, thought the mule was completely weak and knew that he could kick the mule's butt.
The pig, who was avoiding the mule's long teeth, ran for the mule's rear end. He should have thought twice because the mule kicked the pig right in the face. The pig flew off the bridge and landed loudly onto some grass. The pig, who realized that he couldn't win, ran away. "If I have to fight an old mule again," he thought, "I will have to worry about the bite and the kick." The mule, who was barely bothered, slowly crossed the bridge and went on his way.
On the 18th of April in 6200 B.C. there was a daring and arrogant wild pig. There was also a wise old mule who did not like fighting. On that sunny date 8210 1/2 years and 10 days ago both animals were standing on the same bridge, which was somewhere in southern Brazil. But it wasn't known as Brazil back then. And all was not peaceful, because the animals were not on good terms with each other. They were tussling, furiously biting and kicking with tooth and hoof.
Here's a third example:
It quickly became a chaotic encounter.
The pig wanted to have a brutal fight with the old mule. He viciously started teasing the mule, who became visibly mad. Because he thought the mule was weak, he gloated excitedly. The pig decided to attack from behind to avoid the mule's razor sharp teeth. So he immediately charged.
The clever mule threw his heel back. The mule savagely kicked him in the face. The pig who soared in the air, landed in the grass. The pig ran like a coward.
(This student really likes adding adverbs!)
Didn't they do a great job? These kids are only ten and eleven years old! They used two little tricks to add so much interest to a simple folk tale. Reading these stories gives me so much satisfaction!